One Liner Jokes

• We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations–we’re doing everything we can to keep our marriage together

• Mother: So, you want to become my son-in-law?Boy: Not really, but I don’t see any other way to marry your daughter

• Two women were talking about their new milkman.First: He’s very good looking, punctual & dresses so smartly.And so quickly too!, said the other.

• Tom and Dick were walking in the highlands then suddenly Tom fell down a deep hole. Dick: Are you ok? Tom: Fine thanks! Dick: Did you break anything? Tom: No, there’s nothing down here!

• An old: Doc, I think I’m getting senile. Several times lately, I have forgotten to zip up. Doc: That’s not senility. Senility is when you forget to zip down.

• Boss: We are very keen on cleanliness. Did you wipe your feet on the mat as you came in? New employee: Yes, sir. Boss: We are also keen on truthfulness. There is no mat.

• It isn’t widely known, but the first toilet seat was invented by an Irish scientist in the 18th century. The invention was later modified by an English inventor who put a hole in the seat.

• John always leave an empty milk carton in the refrigerator just in case someone wants their coffee black.

• Guide: I welcome u all to the Niagra falls. These are the world’s largest waterfalls & the sound intensity of the waterfall is so high, sound of even 20 supersonic planes passing can’t b heard! Now may I request the ladies to keep quiet so that we can hear the Niagra Falls??